The Silver Lining

Lately, my thoughts have been inundated with not so great memories. Thoughts that remind me of things people have done to hurt me over the course of a lifetime, but mostly memories from more recent years. Some hurts not intentional, but some hurts... very, very intentional. As I've been pondering those things I have set out to combat those thoughts. After all, we are to focus on whatever is noble, true, of good report, etc. There are times though, that it's very hard to do this. At least for me. You see, God made me an analytical person and I seek to understand things that make no sense to me. I will spend hours, days, weeks, trying to understand.

As I set about to try to refocus my mind on the good things, my thoughts perused the bible through the Old Testament and the New Testament. My thoughts went all the way back to Adam and Eve, Cain and Able. People have been hurting each other for a very, very, very long time. It's not always evident why. Honestly, there are way too many variables to try to take on that mountain. That mountain is overwhelming. That mountain can bog a person down for their entire lives if we allow it.
There are times that we can understand the reason/s that someone may lash out or do something hurtful to another, but there are times when we must realize that there are cases when there is no good reason for people to do bad things to others. If a person steals food because they have no food for their family, we can understand that. We can have compassion concerning that. Hopefully, that person tried to reach out for help first. If we can, we should help. But if a person steals just for their own personal gain, well, what excuse can be offered? And there are people out there who hurt others for their own personal gain. There are people out there who use others, again, for their own personal gain. I have a really hard time understanding that. I can't even comprehend it. And like everyone else, my life has been touched by those kinds of people. Some of those people I trusted a great deal.

Today I read a post by a sister in the Lord who finds herself needing to take a break from social media to 'heal.' I saw some of the comments that were made to her and they weren't all nice comments. She is going through a rough time right now and the last thing she needs is people who attack her with their less than compassionate comments. She needs encouragement right now, not criticism.  She is hurting deeply. I truly hope that none of those comments were made by members of  the family of God. I have no way of knowing for certain, but I'm assuming they are friends/acquaintances of hers. This is where we come in. As children of God, siblings of Jesus, we have the opportunity to lift her up and to encourage her. At the very least, to pray for her.

At first, when I started thinking about all of these things I went back to my own childhood years. I remember when the neighbors watched out for each other. I remember when poor moral character was very seriously frowned upon. It was not acceptable social behavior and was met with swift rebuke. I could not say how many times I have asked, what the heck happened to society? But the answers to that are also many. I am not implying that all of society is focused on self gain. There are a great many compassionate people out there who are doing good and make the world around them a better place.

As humans, I think one of our weaknesses (with a great deal of help from the enemy of our souls) is that we have a tendency to fall into the trap of focusing in on the negative. Why do we even do that? I think that part of the reason we do that is because we know instinctively that God did not intend for the world to be a place of hurt. Even if one doesn't believe in God, I think that is an innate concept that was placed inside us by Him, so that we would somehow recognize when things aren't right.

My conclusion to my thinking about all these things is that from the very beginning, back to Adam and Eve's time, there have always been people who choose to do evil. There have always been people who are out for their own personal gain at the expense of hurting others. This is the result of a fallen world. It will not change until Jesus returns and sets up His throne in Jerusalem. So where does that leave us in the meantime? What do we do with those hurts that pop up and plague us yet again from time to time? We must actively, FORCEFULLY, look for the silver lining in those situations. As I have gone over some of the hurts from my recent personal past I have decided to come at them from a new perspective. What is the blessing that I received as a result of this situation? I'm writing it down so that when it raises it's ugly head, and it inevitably will at some point, I can go back and look at how God brought me through it and what He did to bless me because that situation. This also applies to hurts that may go way back. I have worked through most of those, but there are still some residual affects that I have yet to conquer. It will happen because God says that I am an over-comer. This is taking those thoughts captive. This is dwelling on what is good, what is noble, what is true, what is of good report. The good report is what God did to bless us and that He brought us through it. The truth is what God's Word has to say about who we are and what belongs to us.

We cannot control what others do. We can only control what we do. This is not to say that we have to accept toxic relationships or toxic behavior toward us in our lives. We can and we should let those kinds of relationships go - guilt free - we are not obligated to allow it. Letting go of those kinds of relationships is a blessing in itself. I have not fully forgiven everyone who has hurt me. I seem to do it in stages as I work through it. And that's okay. It's okay because God knows that I want to, and He also knows that my human weaknesses and complexities have a tendency to get in the way and there are things that I can't do by myself. Let's face it, sometimes the path to 100% forgiveness is a long one. I've heard it said many times that you know when you've completely forgiven someone is when you can think about the situation without having any feelings about it. For a lot of those situations I am getting closer to that place. But just as God still loves those who hurt us, He still loves us too, and He is walking that path with us. He will not leave us, He will not abandon us. Nothing will separate us from the love of God. He promised to complete the work He began in us. If some of the people who have hurt you are Christians, He will complete the work He started in them too. But again, in the meantime, it's okay to separate yourself from toxic relationships and toxic behavior toward you from others. There are times when it's proper and necessary to confront bad behavior. Paul confronted Peter. Jesus confronted the Pharisees and the Sadducees. Pray about it, be led by the Spirit of God. Don't confront in anger - it does not lead to a good result. Be prepared that confrontation may not solve or change anything. If that is the end result of confrontation it's okay to decide what is best for you.

Those are my thoughts...

If you ever struggle with hurts ( I am pretty sure I'm not the only one 😁), actively start looking for those silver linings because God is in the midst of those clouds to make those things work out for our good. He promised.

May abundant grace, mercy, and total well-being from God the Father and the Anointed One, our Lord Jesus, be yours (ours)! I Timothy 1:2  The Passion Translation

PS Sorry if I rambled!

It's all about the grace 💖